What could go wrong?

I have a gig on Saturday;
that’s only a few days away!
I’m supposed to be at my best.
Instead I’m getting rather stressed.
I have a raging cold sore on my lip,
so, if anybody has a good tip
for removal of said abomination
(which threatens world domination)
please now speak
or forever hold your peace.
(I’ve got an awful feeling that on the night
it’s going to steal the limelight!)
It’s an eyesore –
not the cold sore –
the spot just below my eye!
Ruby red it is – I daren’t cry,
I might make it worse.
Instead, I turn to verse.
(Taking extra care in my mind
not to be the least bit unkind)
A week ago, I felt (and looked) great.
I was excited – couldn’t wait
to serenade with my song.
Now I also have an ulcer on my tongue,
reminding me that I need to rest.
(You couldn’t make this up!)
Then there’s the dress.
It’s a little gingham number – size 10.
I bought it last year – well, it fit me then!
I’ve put on quite a bit of weight.
Oh dear, I’m going to look a state
with nappy pins holding me together;
and ribbons to complete the tether.
My character will look a fright,
but all will be well on the night.
It’s a good thing the act is comedy –
I could hardly be taken seriously!
I’m hoping my impediments
will detract from the evidence
that I haven’t been too good
at practising as much as I should

Wish me luck!

How I think I'll look
How I think I’ll look

LC, the Lonesome Cowgirl

LC, the lonesome cowgirl
She’s kinda deranged
LC, the lonesome cowgirl
She’s really pretty… strange

LC’s got herself a gig
For Independence Day
She’ll have you squealing like a pig
If you let her get her way

LC needs to write more words
And practise her geetar
Just three more lines (mostly absurd)
Is all she needs thus far

She’ll make you laugh, she’ll make you cry
She’ll have you shake with fear
But still you’ll love her all the while
She’s weird, but most sincere

She’ll sing her tale of tragedy
Regale you with her truth
Her dark and honest travesty
Is sure to raise the roof

LC, the lonesome cowgirl
Lost her horse or found a rope
She’s coming to a place near you
But is she ready? Nope!


LC’s Facebook page